5 Habits Making Your Life Way Harder as a Mom (And What to Do Instead)
Keep reading this post to learn:
5 habits to ditch to make your life easier as a mom
5 habits to do instead of the ones we're ditching
Can we all agree that being a mom is hard? 👀
Honestly, being a person is hard sometimes 😂
But over the last few years, I've realized certain habits quietly make life harder than it needs to be. They're not huge, dramatic problems. They're usually the small things that sneak into our routines and slowly drain our energy, patience, and capacity.
And a few months ago, I looked down at my lunch and realized I was eating the leftover crusts from my daughter's PB&J, half an apple she didn't finish, and a random cheese stick I grabbed from the fridge.
I was standing at the kitchen counter eating toddler leftovers and genuinely thought that counted as lunch 👍
Spoiler alert: it didn't, lol.
That moment got me thinking about all the little habits I'd normalized that were making motherhood, and life in general, way more difficult than necessary.
So, today I'm sharing five habits I stopped doing that have made a huge difference in my energy, sanity, and ability to show up as the peacefully productive version of myself.
And the best part? Most of these apply whether you're a mom or not!
01. Stop Winging Mealtime (Especially Your Own)
I know this sounds so basic. We all know we need to eat (right?).
But there's a very specific version of this that I think a lot of moms fall into.
You make breakfast for your kids.
You make lunch for your kids.
You clean up after everyone else.
Then suddenly you realize you're hungry, so you grab a handful of crackers, finish half a sandwich someone didn't eat, and call it lunch.
And somehow your brain logs that as: I ate.
But the truth is, you didn't really feed yourself.
And for a long time, I kept wondering why I was crashing every afternoon around 3 p.m.? Why I felt foggy? Why I wanted to eat everything in sight after my daughter went to bed?!
Part of the answer was really simple: I wasn't actually eating meals.
The shift that changed everything wasn't meal prepping seven identical lunches every Sunday. That sounds miserable to me, honestly 😂
Instead, I created a small rotation of lunches I genuinely enjoy!
A few of my go-to lunches right now are:
Tuna salad with crackers and veggies
Protein-packed snack plates
Greek yogurt bowls with fruit and granola
Buffalo chicken salads
Dinner leftovers
I know, it’s not groundbreaking or fancy, and that’s kinda the point. I’m much more likely to fuel my body properly with a handful of meals I actually like that I can throw together quickly.
When I stopped making lunch a decision I had to make while hungry and overwhelmed, everything got easier.
Because feeding yourself isn't a luxury. It's maintenance!
And maintenance matters.
02. Stop Waiting for Self-Care to Show Up on Your Calendar
Okay, but can we talk about self-care in a very practical way for a minute?
Because I think a lot of us have a definition of self-care that's way too narrow. Myself very much so included.
For years, I pictured self-care as bubble baths, spa days, candles, long morning routines, and uninterrupted alone time.
And while those things are dreamy, they weren't fitting into my actual life. Especially in the baby and toddler years.
So, I had to realistically redefine self-care. And now?
A workout is self-care.
A walk is self-care.
Eating lunch is self-care.
Getting enough sleep is self-care.
Doing my skincare routine is self-care.
Reading a book instead of scrolling social media is self-care.
My biggest aha moment was when I realized that the most impactful self-care habits in my life aren't glamorous.
They're practical! And practical self-care is often the stuff that keeps us functioning!
And the other self-care mistake I see so many women make is waiting for it to magically appear in their schedules.
Bestie, I’m going to hold your hand when I say this, but: it's not going to.
You have to intentionally put it there. You have to schedule it. Protect it. Prioritize it.
The same way you would a doctor's appointment or a work meeting.
Because taking care of yourself isn't extra. It's what gives you the capacity to take care of everything else 🫶
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03. Stop Trying to Hold Everything in Your Head
Okay, if you're the person in your household who holds the majority of the mental load in your brain alone, this one's for you.
The dentist appointments.
The school events.
The birthday parties.
The grocery list.
The permission slips.
The thing your spouse said they'd schedule but hasn't yet.
In case you need someone to validate this for you: mental load is a real thing.
And one of the hardest parts about it is that it's invisible 🫣
Nobody sees you remembering all the things. Nobody sees the constant mental tabs open in your brain.
But YOU feel it, right? I definitely did.
For me, one of the biggest game-changers in re: mental load was creating a shared Google Calendar with my husband.
And everything for our family goes in it.
Appointments.
Events.
Schedules.
Tasks.
Deadlines.
Family commitments.
EvErYtHiNg.
The goal really isn’t to become more organized, it was to get more information out of my brain and to a place where my husband could share it with me.
Because when information lives only inside your head, you become the family's operating system!
And that's exhausting. But, when information lives in a shared system, everyone has access to it.
(Side note: if you’re like “Wow, I wish I knew how to use Google Cal to share the mental load” — I’ve taught over 130+ people how to with this Google Cal Masterclass!)
Everyone has ownership. Everyone can contribute. And that's healthier for everyone involved.
As a bonus, we recently started using a visual routine chart with our daughter!
She's three years old, and being able to see what comes next in her day has been incredibly helpful.
It's building independence for her and saving me from answering the same questions over and over again 😅
Which means less mental load for me. And I'll take that every 👏🏼 single 👏🏼 time 👏🏼
04. Stop Living With Recurring Friction
Okay. This one might sound silly, but stay with me because it might actually change your life.
For years, we only had one set of sheets for each bed.
And every time laundry day rolled around, the exact same thing happened:
I'd strip the beds.
Wash the sheets.
Dry the sheets.
Get distracted.
Forget about the sheets.
Then realize at bedtime that the beds weren't made 👍
Cue frustration! Cue annoyance! Cue sleeping on the couch vs. my bed because I was exhausted, which is not the vibe!
So, last year, I bought a second set of sheets for every bed in our house.
And listen: It changed my life more than it should have 😂
Now, when I strip the beds, I immediately put fresh sheets on.
And while this story is technically about sheets, it's really about something bigger.
It's about identifying recurring friction in your life and removing it.
Because sometimes we get so used to little annoyances that we stop noticing them.
But they still drain our energy, create stress, and make life harder than it needs to be.
So ask yourself: What is your version of the sheets problem?
What small change could remove a recurring frustration from your daily life?
Because sometimes hustling sanely looks like making a one-time investment that saves your future self from being annoyed over and over again 🫶
05. Stop Expecting Your Pre-Mom Routines to Work in Your Current Season
If this one made you feel some type of way, please know that it also took me a long time to learn.
Before becoming a mom, I had routines I loved and was so incredibly proud of.
My mornings felt peaceful.
My workouts felt consistent.
My workdays felt structured.
It was my version of flow state.
Then I became a mom, and, surprise, suddenly those routines stopped working.
For a while, I defined that as my own personal failure.
I thought:
"Why can't I stay consistent?"
"Why can't I make this work anymore?"
"What's wrong with me?"
But nothing was wrong with me! My life had changed in a pretty monumental way, which meant my schedule, capacity, and priorities changed, too.
I was trying to run a completely different life through the same operating system. So, of course, it wasn't working.
And one of the most freeing things I've learned is that fragmented habits still count.
A workout that takes an hour because of interruptions is still a workout.
Reading ten pages is still reading.
Folding half a basket of laundry now and the other half later still counts.
The all-or-nothing mindset is what makes everything harder. Not the interruptions, imperfect routines, or the season you're in.
The expectation that everything has to look the way it used to is what creates so much unnecessary frustration.
Your current season has different constraints than previous seasons, and the good news is that's not a problem to solve!
It's a reality to design around! And once I accepted that, everything became lighter ☁️
Because I stopped trying to recreate the routines of an old version of me and started building routines that support the person I am today, and I encourage you to try that, too 🫶
Remember what we always say around here, bestie: Your schedules and routines are tools, not chains.
Your Homework:
You knew I wasn't going to let you leave class (aka this blog post) without homework, right? RIGHT! 😘
Step 1:
Buy an extra set of sheets for every bed in your house.
Just trust me on this one!
Step 2:
Choose one of the other habits from this list and implement it this week. Need me to choose for you? Okay, twist my arm.
Schedule your movement for next week.
Whether it's:
a walk
a Pilates class
strength training
stretching
dancing around your kitchen
Put it on your calendar before the week starts because taking care of yourself shouldn't (and won’t) happen by accident.
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