How to Reset if You Haven’t Been Hustling Sanely
Keep reading this post to learn:
What it looks like to recognize when you’ve slipped back into old hustle culture habits
My 5-step Hustle Sanely Reset to gently guide you back to living a peacefully productive life
Have you ever had one of those moments where you look around at your life and you're like…girl, what are we doing? Because I know what it feels like to teach peaceful productivity for a living and then realize I'm over here answering emails at 9:30 at night, saying yes to things I don't have capacity for, looking at my phone every 14 seconds, and trying to cram 47 things into a Tuesday.
Like…HELLO?? Who let her back in?
Maybe you’ve fallen back into some old habits. Maybe you’ve been saying yes to too much. Maybe you’re working all the time. Maybe rest has started feeling like something you have to earn. Maybe your planner is looking REAL cute but you haven't actually looked at it in three weeks.
Or maybe you don't even know exactly what’s wrong – you just know that your life feels a little more chaotic than you want it to.
And if that's you, I want you to know something right out of the gate:
You are not failing at Hustle Sanely. You probably just need a little reset. And I actually think this is one of the most important parts of learning to live a peacefully productive life because hustle culture is not something you quit one time and then you're magically immune to forever.
So if you were sitting there nodding your head like “yep, me right now!”, I’ve got you – here’s how we’re gonna do a Hustle Sanely reset:
Step 01: Notice it without shaming yourself (because hello, Key 1 to Hustling Sanely is Get Your Mindset Right!)
This is where we have to start, because sometimes we realize we're overwhelmed and immediately start beating ourselves up for being overwhelmed.
We're like:
“Why can't I get it together?”
“I should know better.”
“I literally teach this stuff.” (@ me, lol)
“What is wrong with me?”
You don't need to shame yourself into a peaceful life. You need to get curious about what's happening. Instead of asking, “Why am I so bad at this?” we need to ask questions like:
What has changed?
What have I taken on?
What am I saying yes to?
Where am I rushing?
Where am I spending my time?
What am I doing out of obligation?
What am I doing because I genuinely want to?
Where have I stopped making space for rest?
Where have I stopped protecting the things that matter to me?
Because sometimes the answer isn't that you suddenly became bad at time management.
Sometimes your life genuinely got fuller. Or you entered a new season and your capacity changed. Sometimes you said yes to one thing…and then another thing…and then another thing…and now you're sitting in your car eating a granola bar for dinner, wondering how the heck this happened.
So first, just notice.
Step 02: Decide your yesses for this season.
So we’ve recognized and owned where we’re at and now we’re gonna come back to what matters.
This is one of my favorite questions to ask when life starts feeling chaotic: what actually matters right now, in this season? Hustle culture loves to convince us that everything matters equally all the time. Your work matters. Your kids matter. Your marriage matters. Your friendships matter. Your house matters. Your health matters. Your hobbies matter. Your inbox matters. Your side project matters. Your laundry matters. Your workout matters. Your sourdough starter matters.
EVERYTHING MATTERS. And it does…but not everything is urgent. If everything is urgent, you live your entire life feeling behind and stressed out.
So when I need a reset, I come back to asking myself what are my priorities IN THIS SEASON? What needs my best time and energy right now every day? Every week? Every month?
And also, what do I want my life to feel like while I'm showing up for these priorities?
Because I don't just want to accomplish my goals. I want to be a person who enjoys her life while pursuing them. I want to be present with my family. I want to have margin. I want to sleep. I want to laugh. I want to go outside. I want to have conversations that aren't interrupted by me checking my phone. I want to actually experience the life I'm working so hard to build.
And sometimes getting back to that means getting really honest about what deserves our attention right now.
Step 03: Decide your nos for this season.
Now that you know what matters, you have to make space for it. And that might mean saying no to other things for now. I’ve said this many times on the show but saying “no” to something for a season doesn’t mean it doesn’t matter to you – it just means you’re honoring your capacity.
When we don’t decide our nos, life decides them for us.
When I was hustling insanely a few weeks back, before I did my Hustle Sanely Reset, my nos ended up being things like uninterrupted quality time with Everly and taking time off of work/chores to rest – 2 things that I don’t want to be saying no to! If I don’t want life to decide my nos, that means I have to do it with intention.
And if anyone else out there is like me, a recovering all-or-nothing thinker, you don’t have to say a total no or a total yes…you can do partial nos and yesses, too. Think of it as a yes with boundaries!
To help you figure out where your nos should go, ask yourself:
“What am I currently saying yes to that is costing me something I actually value?”
And then get really specific. Is it costing you sleep? Rest? Time with your people? Margin? Your health? Your ability to be present? Your peace? Your weekends? Your ability to actually enjoy the season you’re in?
Because sometimes the thing we need to say no to isn't necessarily a bad thing. It might actually be a really good thing! It just might not be a good thing for you, right now. And that is okay.
You don't have to make every decision based on whether or not something is good. Sometimes the question is simply: “Is this good for me in this season?”
And if the answer is no, you have permission to let it be a no. Or a not right now. Or a yes, but only for 3 nights instead of 6. Or a yes, but every other week instead of every week. Or a yes, but I’m not going to do it while also taking on these other 4 things.
That, my friends, is what it looks like to honor your capacity instead of constantly trying to expand it.
Step 04: Rebuild your rhythms based on your yesses.
Okay, so now you know what matters and you’ve decided what you’re saying no to in order to make space for those things so we need to actually build your life around your yesses. This is where your rhythms come in. Because it’s one thing to say, “My family is a priority.”
But if your calendar has you working until 6 PM every night, running around to activities every evening, and then trying to squeeze in family time whenever there happens to be a few spare minutes…well, your calendar is telling a slightly different story.
And I think this is where a lot of us get tripped up. We know what matters to us and we genuinely WANT to prioritize certain things but we haven't actually created rhythms that make those things easier to do consistently. So I want you to look at the yesses you just identified and ask:
“What rhythm would support this yes?”
If you've been in hustle mode for a while, I don't think you need to immediately rebuild your entire life. I think you need to get back to some simple rhythms.
What's happening in the morning?
What's happening at night?
When are you working?
When are you stopping?
When are you intentionally not working?
When are you eating?
When are you moving your body?
When are you spending time with the people you love?
When are you putting your phone down?
When are you resting?
Your life needs some structure, but it also needs room to breathe.
I actually have a free workshop called The Chaos to Calm Workshop where I walk you through how to design a weekly outline based on your priorities You can get it for free here!
I think it’s especially relevant if you're doing this reset because in the workshop I teach you how to create routines that make your life less stressful AND how to create a weekly schedule that weaves those routines into your actual life. Routines are all about creating some predictability and support around the things that matter to you.
Look at the things you said matter in this season and ask:
“What routine or rhythm would make this easier to consistently say yes to?”
You don't need to overhaul your entire schedule. You might just need a few intentional routines that support the life you're trying to live.
Step 05: Take some time to dilly dally.
And I mean that literally. If you’ve been in hustle mode for a while, one of the best things you can do is give yourself a half or full day where you don’t have to be productive.
Not a day where you catch up on all the chores you’ve been putting off.
Not a day where you finally tackle your inbox.
Not a day where you organize your entire house because you “have the time now.”
I mean a day where you dilly dally.
You sleep in if you can.
You make a slow breakfast.
You go get coffee.
You browse a bookstore.
You take a walk.
You throw your phone in a lake (jk…kind of).
You sit outside.
You read a book.
You watch a comfort show.
You putter around your house.
You take your kid somewhere fun just because.
You do things that don't necessarily need to get done.
And honestly, I think this is especially important when you’ve been hustling insanely because sometimes you don’t even realize how deeply you’ve been operating in go-go-go mode until you stop.
When I did my Hustle Sanely Reset, I realized that I didn't just need a better schedule. I needed to remember what it felt like to not be in a constant state of trying to get somewhere. Because that’s one of the sneaky things about hustle culture…it convinces us that there is always somewhere else we need to get to.
There will always be another email.
Another load of laundry.
Another goal.
Another project.
Another thing that could technically be optimized.
So sometimes the most peacefully productive thing you can do is stop producing.
The point of this intentional dilly-dally time is not to make your rest useful but to remember that your life is happening right now.
You don't have to earn a slow morning.
You don't have to finish your to-do list before you’re allowed to enjoy your Saturday.
You don't have to maximize every free hour.
You are allowed to just…be a person.
So if you’ve been hustling lately, I want you to try this.
Pick a day or even just a few hours to just BE… to dilly-dally!!!
Wander around. Do something for no reason. Let yourself be bored. Follow a little whim. Enjoy your people. And notice what happens. Notice how your body feels. Notice what you start thinking about when you're not constantly consuming or accomplishing. Notice what you actually enjoy.
Because I think sometimes the way back to a peacefully productive life isn't just about figuring out how to fit more of what matters into your schedule. Sometimes it's about remembering why you wanted a peaceful life in the first place.
You wanted to have time for the people you love. You wanted to enjoy your home. You wanted to pursue meaningful goals without sacrificing yourself to them. You wanted to have energy for your actual life. You wanted to be present for the little things. You wanted to look around and think, Dang. I actually like my life.
Hustling sanely isn't a finish line you arrive at and then magically stay at forever. It's a practice. There will be seasons where you're rested, intentional, and living by your priorities… and seasons where you're overcommitted, glued to your phone, saying yes to everything, staying up too late, working during family time, and wondering why the heck you're exhausted. 😂
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